I met Julie two years ago at a white party in the Hamptons. If you don’t know what a white party is, no need to wonder if you’ve missed the best time of your life. A white party is a party where everyone dresses in white. Easy enough. The rest people do at a party is the same. Lines of cocaine, lots of drinking, fucking in the bathroom, and being assholes all together – no matter the place, that’s a given. Especially in the Hamptons. Rich assholes are the worst. Wearing Prada and Valentino as your underwear doesn’t excuse horrible manners.
Julie happened to be there because of her boyfriend Mark. I happened to be there because I had never been to the Hamptons before. We bumped into each other while waiting at the bar for our overpriced drink – and have remained friends ever since. I must admit Julie enlightened my life like no other person before.
During our numerous conversations, she told me she was dealing with many issues of her own, including serious anger management. She never went into detail. All I know is that her on and off relationship with Mark doesn’t help.
Nowadays, talking with Julie helps me figure out solutions to my own problem. Julie did drugs to cope with her troubled past. Although I never killed my best friend for a boy… She says she didn’t do it but knowing her I’m pretty sure she did.
Julie is a bit extreme. I’m extreme too but she’s just ten times worse than me. She’s like a time bomb ready to explode at any given moment. No warning. Just a plain loud boom that makes building collapse in fifteen seconds. I’m more like a pressure cooker that hasn’t been adjusted right and suddenly blows up – without shrapnel in it though. I’m not the terrorist type. Far from it. Terrorism actually makes no sense to me. I find it stupid and pointless. Ball-less too if you ask me. These mofos oughta get their balls shredded by a flying bucket of shrapnel for all I care. Maybe then they’d understand the stupidity of their actions.
But to understand stupidity you must be pretty smart to begin with. And I doubt terrorists are smart. Topical conversation for another day… Right now Julie is the center of the attention.
“So what’s up with you girl?” she asks as we sit across the table at Schnippers, ready to attack our burgers.
I slurp a sip of my diet coke. “Lots of stuff. Probably too much stuff. Can’t be summarized over lunch. Good stuff overall though.”
Julie nods. “Oh good. At least you’re not in hell anymore, huh?”
Ha, she’s funny. After she spilled a few beans about her story, my jaw dropped so low it almost dislocated itself. I never thought she’d be part of the program. Actually, I thought she’d crash and burn before ever trying to save herself.
The girl hasn’t revealed everything yet but I expect the rest of the tale to be juicy – juicier than what I heard so far – given the craziness she already put herself through.
“So girl, what’s up with you?” I ask while chewing on a sweet potato fry.
“Fighting with Mark. Arguing over bullshit mainly. Accepting certain things doesn’t help with relationship problems. Guys are just so dumb, I’m amazed how I haven’t become a lesbian already.”
I laugh. “Oh stop.”
She shakes her head. “No seriously. I’m at the end of the rope here. What’s going on with you? Any love interest?”
I laugh again. “Nope. None in sight.”
“What about your minion? You liked him. I remember you talking about him a lot.” She winks.
I snort. “John isn’t who I thought he was.”
“Why? He turned out to be a big goo monster?”
“Speaking of experience?”
She sighs. “Yeah that was fun while it lasted. So why don’t you like John?”
“I’m just not feeling the vibe anymore.”
She raises an eyebrow. “What vibe?”
“You know the flirtation vibe. I thought he liked me in that way, not just as a former alcoholic slash addict trying to help me.”
“Ah yes. I’ve met a lot of those. They’re the worst.”
I laugh. “Yep.”
“So he never had any intentions to date you, huh?”
“Not even fuck me, no.”
She laughs. “That’s sad. The world we live in…”
I nod. “Yeah. It’s pretty pathetic.”
“So you wanna hit a meeting later?”
“I guess.”
She smiles. “You can vent about John all you want in your share.”
“And you know I love to vent.”
“Haha yes I do.”
Going to meetings with Julie is always an adventure. She picks the most random ones downtown, usually dark rooms filled with old timers. Thirty if not forty year recovering alcoholics who’ve been through hell before finding the road to salvation. I can’t say I’ve experienced the same hardships. But I’ve reached the gates of hell just like they did.
And so did Julie. I like her company. She soothes me. I don’t need shiny people around to make me believe in recovery. What she gives me is a ground to build my strength back up. And for that, I must say she’s the only one I trust.
When we met, she was a lost soul. Her progress over the span of two years is tremendous. I look up to her. Want to be like her someday. Will I ever manage to reach that level of self control? Only time will tell.
Right now we’re eating burgers, enjoying each other’s company. Julie is my best friend, and I must admit I love her to death.
To be continued…